Tuesday, March 01, 2005

Multiple love

I have always wondered if it was possible to love two people the same way, with a similar sense of feeling and with the same intensity. I have asked a number of people this question and the first reaction I get is a squinted face from most of the women who give me a thorough top-down appraisal leading to a scumbag conclusion and the men with a naughty, smirkish been-there-done-that kinda grin that makes me more abashed than anything else. I have never understood as to why its made out to be a moral dilemma or a crime to be able to confess that you might have feelings for another person when you are seeing somebody else. People immediately launch into a lecture on ethics and morality and loyalty and I am left bewildered.It's almost as if once in a relationship, one has lost the right to feel something like that,which I believe is completely unfair. Their tirade continues which consists of how you would feel if it happened to you to what an insensitive ass****. Strange people, strange ideas,strange reactions, badiya hain!!!


Blogger Abishek Goda said...


Its all about your affordability and manageability. Well, if one can keep two people waiting, one need not worry about morals-ethics domain.

Okay. Not to kid any more, Its not required that people lose the right to feel love once they are in a relationship. The problem starts only when they feel "relationship" when already in a relationship. That too only in our society. No, there atleast a talk, only in this society. And my reasoning is that we folk have simple gotten our culture wrong. The gods depicted in our literature managed this scenario, didnt they? And, if we do believe that our literatures are narrations of something that happened in our society, then we have to accpet that "multiple love" was not restricted in our culture.

Is there a mistake?

1:20 AM  
Blogger Saraansh said...

I am sorry if what I wrote gave off the wrong idea but it was not my intention to suggest that anybody have two partners-all I wanted to say was that its possible that one might feel similarly about two people.I don't know how it would be if I was at the receiving end but I do believe that its possible and that it happens.

8:46 PM  
Blogger Abishek Goda said...


that is a problem in my communication. I can assure you that I understood the topic in the right spirit. So, don't feel sorry or bad.

11:12 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


well it is possible to love 2 people the same way...with a similar sense of feeling,....it is natural for a person to fall in and out of love...but i dont agree with the fact tht the level of intensity is the same ...one has not lost the right to feel something for someone...but such feelings hold no value when compared to wt one's created from a relationship..so these feelings flash in and out during a relationship..and its upto the person to explore..well for me ...id say u are strange to think that this was unfair....ill end my comment with... Strange people, strange ideas,strange reactions, badiya hain!!!


10:22 AM  
Blogger Saraansh said...

Point taken.

I believe I have more or less explained myself in the chat we had.

8:41 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Heard a lot about this infamous :-D post. Had to check it out!!!

Your thought process is not strange, i agree with you on some level but I have to go with Pavi on this- the intensity may not be the same. Most of the time it's you who think it is because of various reasons. Intensity again is a fine line between "like" and "love".

Word of advice. If you have built a relationship with someone but your are 'questioning' your equation with someone else, you may have to rethink if you love the first person at all! End of the day it's about making your RELATIONSHIP work.

If you read my blog you would notice this blog about commitment. If you really love a person you better be giving it everything you got, and do everything in your powers to preserve it.

I am not judging you buddy, just having my take on the subject.


8:49 PM  
Anonymous Prophet said...

just look at things this way.... love as an effort and not as a feeling.... it might just answer your question!!!

1:23 PM  
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